Alright, at one point, most people check out online dating. Even more so these days, everything's online or requires an internet connection: Netflix, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Hulu, Directv, and so on. Including dating. Not gonna lie, I've tried online dating... and still am, but seriously gonna cease that soon.
Back in my teens, I didn't ever date. I was that shy girl that had social anxiety and kept to herself, drew a lot and kept headphones in my ears once my oldest brother got me an mp3 player for Christmas. So, I came across as this weird, odd, strange girl that no one liked. Wore dark a lot too. So I had no luck on meeting guys in person. I did get asked out by a guy in my class, but I automatically assumed it was a prank so I shook my head and said no. Another bad experience was my final day at the technology center in 2010, a guy from my class asked me out. I ended up saying yes and he told me he'd pick me up around 4.
I got stood up. To this day, my sister still makes fun of me for that, usually when we're arguing about relationships, she always tosses in "at least I've never been stood up".
Online dating is how I met my last three exes. And upon trying online dating again, I see how flawed and scary it is. I usually try the sites that are suggested to me: okcupid, meetme, pof. Well, just those actually. And each one I have had bad experiences. More so on meetme, which I don't recommend. Even if you're trying to just find new friends, it's not the place to go.
Before on okcupid, there was this guy that had his profile photo blacked out and he would message consistently. And he kept asking me where I lived. Keep in mind, he lived in another state on the east coast. Next thing I know, on his location, it showed Tulsa. Then Hobart and Lawton. All areas I have lived in or go to often. I ended up quitting for some time.
On pof (Plenty Of Fish), the guys on there were mostly asking for hookups and talking dirty. Which is to be expected.
Meetme... there's plenty wrong with that. I have been sent dick pics, offers from couples, guys offering me a lot of money to sleep with them or make porn, guys offering to get me pregnant, guys asking me to marry them, guys from other countries asking me to marry them so they can stay here, a guy i knew in school wanting to sleep with me behind his wife's back, I have had guys call me names, threaten to hurt or kill me if I don't sleep with them or meet them (never do either way), and had them tell me they're interested but don't want to be with me if I have a kid. And most of this is guys around my own age or a year or two younger than me.
Online dating is not for everyone. Which, apparently, is not for me. I guess they assume since I'm petite and nice, they can bully me into what they want me to do. Then usually I bring up my interests, one being knife throwing. Sometimes they stop or they weirdly get into it even more. Had a guy once before tell me blood turns him on.
I think most guys show an interest because they see me as this fragile girl that looks nice, polite, kind. But when they learn of my interests, hobbies, and favorite movies/shows, they are usually genuinely surprised. Most stop talking to me at that point.
They usually expect me to say reality tv is my favorite thing, that romantic movies are, and probably whatever hobbies and interests. And, I get this a lot, a fan of pop music.
It's more like this though: horror movies, comedies, action, knife throwing, drawing, writing, playing musical instruments, rock and metal music. Likely more on that later. The Walking Dead, Family Guy, and of course, Jackass. I think the last one throws a lot of them off or something because they see it as gross and don't understand why I like it.
Another thing that happens often when it comes to online dating is when guys ask me if I have ever seen The Notebook. I have not, one believed I was lying before, but no I haven't ever seen it. There is also when they compare me to my sister. And when I tell them my name, they always say "like Ariana Grande!". So, I'm to the point of telling people to just call me Ana, it's my nickname. Used to be Ari, but not anymore. Guess why.
You'll meet a lot of different people when it comes to online dating. Most may get into it a lot, others probably use it to flirt, get money, or even just sleep around with others.
But, if you are more like I am where you just want a real relationship with actual love (and if you're a single parent like I am, want someone who will accept that you have a child or more) and someone that has similar interests, long lasting love, it likely won't be for you.
I don't recommend it for teens either. Please, do not try online dating because you don't know what you will run into. I often see it in the news where teens meet someone online and it turns bad. Be more focused on surviving through school than worrying about being the only one not getting dates or anything. Hell, I didn't date in school... I stayed focused on my favorite school subjects and music. And drawing. Plus my other oldest brother would always tell me to wait on trying to date.
So, like I said, online dating has pros and cons... mostly cons on my part. I guess the pro to it for me was if I hadn't tried, then I wouldn't have met my ex husband and in turn, I wouldn't have had my only child. That's something I won't ever regret. But the cons are not worth it. Just let it happen whenever, don't try to rush it.
You never know when you will meet "the one" if you're out in public or something.
For me, dating in person is difficult because I live out in the damn country and the nearest town here has the worst people to try dating. Plus most of those guys know my sister.
Try online dating at your own risk, it's not all that it's portrayed as in those eharmony and farmers only commercials.
Love
Ariana
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